The Importance of Pronouns

Using pronouns to refer to other people is a regular part of communication that we often take for granted.  We usually assume common gender pronouns like he/him and she/her based on a person’s appearance or their name.  In fact, a person’s gender identity and the pronouns they use can’t be known based on a name or how they look especially if they are not able to or do not want to conform to binary gender stereotypes. If you guess or make an assumption, you might not be right and referring to someone with the wrong pronoun can feel uncomfortable, dismissive, hurtful or offensive.    

At Caring Unlimited, we strive to provide comprehensive, inclusive services to all survivors in a way that is affirming of who they are, and how they identify.  

Survivors of domestic abuse and violence have had their personal autonomy limited by the person causing them harm.  Not only do LGBTQIA+ survivors often experience additional forms of oppression and injustice based on their gender identity, gender expression, and sexual orientation, but their identity is often exploited as another means to control them by the person using abuse.     

In our community, we all have the power to influence and create change that moves us collectively toward a more just society.  By introducing ourselves with our pronouns and asking those with whom we are speaking what pronouns they use, and using those pronouns, we can consistently create an environment of mutual understanding and respect.  We recognize that people may use neo-pronouns other than they, she, or he, and other times they may wish to be referred to in the third person by their name.  We recognize each person's choices about with whom and when they share this information.   

By using our pronouns in all the places we show up; including our email signatures, online meetings, educational settings, and social media, we recognize and value the unique identity of each person we serve.